Texas A&M fans need to prepare for a horror film of a football season with Bobby Petrino working for Jimbo Fisher.
Let's just say there is a chance Texas A&M coaches Jimbo Fisher and Bobby Petrino will Scream at each other during Aggie football games all season long.
Skeet Ulrich, eat your heart out. Let's just hope they don't kill each other off in the first scene like they're Drew Barrymore or something. It'd be a bold strategy, Cotton, but we could be playing with fire in College Station. Fisher hiring Petrino as his offensive coordinator could be everything the Aggies need to turn the corner. It could also be the equivalent of a Wes Craven horror film series.
One SEC coach said to Lindy's under the condition of anonymity that this could be "a Nightmare on Elm Street scenario." So … who is Freddy Krueger, and who burned Freddy Krueger to a crisp?
I don't know if Texas A&M will be good this season, but the Aggies could be so damn explosive!
Texas A&M football: Jimbo Fisher and Bobby Petrino could be a Wes Craven film
Look. College Station, Texas might as well be on the other side of the world from Potsdam, New York, but I get the comparison. When Craven came up with the idea for one of his most notable franchises, he was teaching humanities at my father's alma mater of Clarkson University. Their Greek row is on Elm Street and Madstop, the fictional town were it is set, is Potsdam backward!
Potsdam gave us Blue Öyster Cult's Buck Dharma, the best player not in the Hockey Hall of Fame in Dave Taylor, Freddy Krueger, and indirectly, yours truly. I feel like I'm an expert on the subject, even though I don't watch horror movies because I'm a big chicken who grew up in the shadow of … The Big Chicken. Regardless, Texas A&M has a chance to be a blockbuster, or a complete tire fire.
Frankly, I think people are running out of patience with Fisher. His 2013 national title at Florida State was a long time ago. People have forgotten about it. Heck, high school recruits may not even remember it. Then again, I still remember Petrino bailing on my godforsaken NFL team to go to Arkansas in the middle of the season. He did make the Hogs pretty good until he wrecked his hog.
In truth, we're just going to have to see what happens. This partnership is either going to work or it'll blow up in Gig Em's face in the worst manner possible. I like the fact that they are at least trying, Jennifer, but you have to remember that trying always implies the intention of failing. Failure is not flattering in the wonderful world of SEC football. It should be a time, nevertheless.
Here is to Texas A&M football being the unwavering content machine our industry is Wes Craven!
